TURN MY NEWS ONNNNNNNN

I know I just told you about my love for this dude, but I really can't shake this. Right now, I feel like if I listened to Souljaboy every minute of every day for the rest of my life, it wouldn't be enough.

Let's take another look at "Turn My Swag On" - the chorus:

"hopped up out the bed
turn my swag on
took a look in the mirror
say what's up (sup sup)
yeah I'm gettin' money, ohhhwww"

So:
He wakes up.
He immediately turns his swag on (no brushing teeth, no contact lenses, no coffee, no breakfast - just straight to "Swag: ON!").
He looks in the mirror.
He asks himself, "what's up?"
He responds to himself, "Yeah, I'm getting money. Ohhhhwww."

If you don't love that, I don't love you.

The rest of the song is equally as wondiculous (just made that up - half wonderful, more than half ridiculous)...last verse:

"now every time you see me spit
every time you hear me rhyme
every time you see me in your state or town
say what's up (sup sup)
yeeeaaaah, yeeeeaaaahhh"

Now...I get that if I see him in my town I should say "what's up."
But if I see him in my state? That's pretty broad, no?
But wait - every time I see him spit OR hear him rhyme, I'm supposed to say "what's up"? EVERY TIME? That's going to lead to a lot of what'supping. I'm going to be like a what'supbot, roaming the streets of America saying "what's up (sup sup)" until I die.

I don't care. It's worth it.

So this thing is in my head all day long and I can't help but change the words to the chorus...which leads me to my new segment, "Turn My News On" via twitter...Anderson Cooper, you and your 360 IQ got nothin' on me when it comes to presenting the issues of the day:

Sotomayor:
http://bit.ly/MT9dP hopped up on the bench/ turn my robe on/ took a look at Obama/ say what's up (sup sup)/ yeah I'm nominated, ohhhwww

Zambrano:
http://bit.ly/7iWNW hopped up off the mound/ turn my tag on/ took a look at the ump/ say what's up (sup sup)/ yeah I'm Kenny Powers, ohhhwww

As long as there's news to be turned on, we'll be turning it on (as soon as we hop up out the bed): http://twitter.com/scottycrowe.

"I'M IN A RACE"

I finally finished the full-length video of the "I'm In A Race" parody. Not sure if it's a low or a high point... Thanks again to Andy Grush for helping record the track. I wrote the lyrics and did the singing, but the song would have sounded like someone stepping on a child had Andy not sprinkled some magic dust on it.

Warning, this thing is pretty explicit (as is the original) - I mean, what else better to get fired up about and drop some f-bombs?



"I'm In A Race"
by Scotty Crowe

Aww sh*t! Get your Nikes ready, it's about to go down.

Everybody in the place hit the f*ckin' streets
But stay in the motherf*ckin' house

We runnin this, lets go

I'm in a race
I'm in a race
Everybody look at me cause I'm running in a race

I'm in a race
I'm in a race
Take a good hard look at the motherf*ckin race

I'm in a race motherf*cker take a look at me
Straight running real fast in my new Nikes
Running mad miles, wind blowing in my face
You can't stop me motherf*cker cause I'm in a race

Take a picture trick
I'm in a race b*tch
I'm drinkin grape gatorade cause I'm so sick
I got my head band
And my black tighties
I'm burnin calories, you at home in your tighty whities

I'm running a marathon
Eatin oranges and sh*t
The race is long, getting everybody to quit
Cause this ain't Forrest Gump
This is real as it gets
I'm in a race motherf*cker, don't you ever forget

I'm in a race and
I'm running fast and
I got a 13 year old I'm runnin' past and
I'm at the front of the pack, runnin' fast like a Kenyan
If you see my back, then you sho' ain't winnin'

Get the f*ck up
This race is real!

F*ck the gym, I'm in a race motherf*cker
F*ck treadmills, I run the streets motherf*cker
I'm in the race with my boys motherf*cker
My iPod nano make noise motherf*cker

Hey ma if you could see me shine
Arms spread wide as I cross the line
Gonna run the marathon in 1 hour, 9
Like Usain Bolt, anything is possible!

Never thought I'd run in a race
It sucks when my whole body's chafed
Prefontaine, look at me

Never thought I'd see the day
With a finish line coming my way
Believe me when I say
I pooped my pants!

I'm in a race
I'm in a race
Everybody look at me cause I'm running in a race

I'm in a race
I'm in a race
Take a good hard look at the motherf*ckin race


**

(first posted at scottycrowe.com).

I WOULD WALK 500 MILES

They say you're supposed to change running shoes every 500 miles. I'm somewhere around there on my current Nike+ Sensor and Lunaracers and decided to replace them as prep for the Portland Marathon begins.

The old (which first hit the streets in January) and the new (which will run the streets this summer). Notice the crazy difference in tread!











**

(first posted at scottycrowe.com).

Sponsor me in the Young Storytellers MENTOR-A-THON here.

YOUNG STORYTELLERS - BIG SHOW MAY 2009!

We had our Big Show at View Park Prep Elementary last week - it was an absolute blast. We had the best crew for this session - 11 of the coolest mentors and 11 of the brightest, funniest, talented young writers you could find.

We all worked together for 8 weeks - the writers' 5 page scripts that came to life at the Big Show were nothing short of amazing. The Scripts and Writers, along with my best attempt at a logline for each story:

"Teddy Grahams" by Kaitlyn
The 3 Teddy Grahams have an adventure that tests their friendship!

"The Boy Who Changed His Ways" by Kaila
Some Juniors at Hawaii High School learn an important lesson about humanity!

"It Will Come To Me Later" by Howard
A magical stone helps an alligator and his crab friend out of a bind!

"Spoiled Nancy and LMF" by Ava
A Christmas Carol meets Clueless!

"A Starry Journey" by Kilea
Two stars take a trip to Sacramento!

"63" by Shannon
A daughter is frustrated by her mother's love for cats!

"King Kai's Planet" by Taj
Space explorers take a dangerous journey to find an important artifact!

"The Magic Wristwear" by Jade
Three siblings are empowered by their new mysterious wristbands and bracelets!

"The Worst Prom Ever" by Janiya
Drama at prom like you've never seen!

"Joyful.J.Holiday" by Josh
A boy finds himself at the Disney Alien training facility!

"2 Days of Hard Work" by Sieara
A girl finds out what it's like to take care of a child!

The kids also gave me an awesome card at the show...thank YOU guys - you were actually the ones who did all the teaching and inspiring...





And I know I've said this before, but Young Storytellers is in need of support. If you or anyone you know can make a contribution (no matter how big or small), it will go a LONG way. This program needs to be in every elementary school in Los Angeles, but without help it may have to downsize. If you can help in any way, it is much much appreciated. Visit this page for more information on how to make a difference.

Thanks thanks thanks...can't wait for next semester!

**

(first posted at scottycrowe.com).

Sponsor me in the Young Storytellers MENTOR-A-THON here.